Sister Columba thought being a nun excluded her from motherhood, but God had other plans. First, she became a mother to her niece and nephews, making great sacrifices to provide for them. Then, she cared for the students who lined up outside her counseling office. And I’ll be forever grateful for the ways she mothered me.

Asking for Help

In 2014, after a year in Tanzania, I was deeply lonely. The thrill of crossing cultures was gone and the challenges of international living were overwhelming. And my upcoming 30th birthday wasn’t helping matters. For months, I wrestled with the question: Would I be alone forever?

My loneliness drove me to Sister’s door. I nervously leaned my head in, “Do you have a moment?” Immediately, she put down her work and gave me her full attention. She listened closely as I shared my worries and fears. 

Sister responded by suggesting we meet every Tuesday. These spiritual direction sessions quickly became the highlight of my week. She spoke into my life in such a straightforward, easily applicable manner. I soaked up her wisdom and insight.

Alyson and friends visit Sr. Columba and her family in 2014

Life-Changing Questions

Then came the moment that forever rendered my life into “before” and “after.” 

One Tuesday, I confessed that I felt ignored by God because my fervent prayers for a husband had gone unanswered. A deep, black sorrow spewed out of my mouth, filling the room. I could no longer be the faithful follower trusting in the unseen. Sister sat in silence, assessing the damage.

She responded slowly, as if in deep thought: “Sometimes when we think God is not answering us, the problem is that we have not recognized the answer that’s already been given.” 

Silence. 

Then the questions started:

“Is there a man in your life who is a strong Christian?  A man you admire? A man who you consider a good friend? A man whose calls or emails make you smile? A man you look forward to seeing when you return home?”

My eyes widened and my mouth hung open in shock. The answer to every question came to me immediately, without hesitation or competition: Brian Rockhold. It was as though I’d been looking through a kaleidoscope and Sister had handed me binoculars. 

Alyson and Brian visit Sister Columba in 2017

Sister’s Challenge

At our next meeting, Sister asked how it went talking with Brian. I nearly laughed in her face! She thought I was going to contact my longtime friend and say a nun thinks I should marry him? That is ridiculous. 

There was no silence or hesitation before her response this time. Sister looked straight into my eyes, leaned forward for emphasis, and said, “Alyson, this is where faith comes in. Be strong and courageous. Tell him what the Lord has revealed to you.”

Three years later, Brian and I were married. Three years after that, we returned to Tanzania. We stayed at Sister Columba’s house, celebrating the huge role she’d played in our lives. But, she had yet another life-altering, truth-bestowing gift to share with us. 

Alyson and Brian stay with Sister Columba in 2020

A God-Given Dream

Late one night, after eating a delicious meal together, Sister started talking about her passion to serve the elderly. She’d seen too many people drawn to the big city for work and then suffer alone when they could no longer provide for themselves. Her heart was burdened by their plight. 

There were many charities serving children or training adults, but the elderly were overlooked. Sister knew that God commanded us to “look after widows in their distress” (James 1:27) and help “the afflicted and the destitute” (Psalm 82:3). And she felt called to do just that! She dreamed of building a free home for elderly Tanzanians. 

Once again, Sister was handing me a pair of binoculars with a clear vision of the future: Brian and I would join her in this ministry.

Once again, I needed strength and courage to follow God’s prompting.

Once again, my spiritual mother exhorted me: “This is where faith comes in. Be strong and courageous. Tell people what the Lord has revealed to you.”